My intention in writing this article is to share a snap shot of my personal journey , for anyone who would love to know more about me.
Sometimes I wonder......How did I get started on this journey which led me up to this point today? I often think about this when I look back at my life. The road has been rough at times. I have been through tremendous pain and suffering, mostly emotional and mental. Now I sit in front of this macbook and reveal my soul to all who reads this. Why would I choose to bear my soul and be so vulnerable to people around the world, some whom Ive never met? Good question..... I'll tell you why............. Its because............. It's who I am....
I am Creativity being expressed in this form. This form that I call Gefa Banini. My entire life I've lived to express myself. When I'm not, I feel stagnant, I begin to wither and die ........like a rose in need of love and light. I choose to express myself because I love to feel ALIVE! So that's what brings me here today.
A few nights ago I had a dream...... I was at a social function with a few other people, both familiar and unfamiliar. A woman came up to me and was going on and on about how much she loves something I posted a picture of online. I don't remember exactly what it was she was raving about, I think it is some type of product I created, some type of accessory....maybe a shoe... you know how dreams are, the memory is vague in some parts. What was unusual to me is my reaction to this woman. Usually, in real life, physical life that is, I am very very veeerrryyyyy sweet and pleasant to people, friends and new acquaintances alike.
But for some reason, I acted a little uppity (as we black folks call it)...... to this lady who was so excited over something I had created. If this were to happen in my physical life, I would be thrilled!!!! that anyone recognized something I have created. I would be ranting and raving about where they seen it, what they think about it, did they share it or like it....ask them to take a pic and sign my mailing list..... I would be acting fanatic that someone loves something I created. This has been my lifelong dream for years!!!!
For some reason in this dream I acted snobby like, "Yeah I know...... What else is new." Then I kind of "thanked" her and walked away, pretty much wondering why she was making such a fuss about something I had no idea about.
photo courtesy of: https://www.ask-angels.com/spiritual-guidance/how-to-connect-with-your-higher-self/
Lightbulb moment! I just realized now why I acted so nonchalantly with the lady at the party. Its because my current ego person-ality, has no idea about something it didn't create. My physical self was not yet aware of the potential of my higher self. It has no idea about something that hasn't happened yet in its world. It is the higher version of myself that created this product this lady was so excited about. Not the limited ego part of me. This all leads to a feeling of lack of deserve-ability. I didn't feel worthy of such praise so I was kind of shying away from it, running away from it in a sense. And covered it up with snobbery and dis-interest.
The version of myself that created this item this woman adores was not yet known to my mental faculties at this stage in my life.
This higher version of myself has such tremendous love, I can feel her constantly beckoning me to walk down this path of my highest potential. After all it is truly who I am. She is slowly making her way into my everyday life, choice by choice, action by action, thought by thought.
Choose love over fear she says, choose love over nervousness, choose love over anger, choose loving to act now over procrastination, choose what you love to do over what you feel you have to do, choose love for others over judgement of others, choose love of self over judgement of self, choose love, choose love, choose love.
I hear her quietly whispering through my heart at each and every moment. Sometimes she explodes with rapture when I'm existing in that state of pure love and bliss.
The reason I do what I do is to touch peoples hearts. To see them love the gift I created for them. To bring joy into their lives.
FIRST CREATION FOR A CLIENT
This is a dashiki I created for a friend and client of mine. She was so overjoyed with her gift, I had to capture this on camera. I felt the moment was right, so I asked her to take a photo. She stood, she posed with such a pure lovely smile and I grabbed my Iphone, saw it was 1% battery left on it and snapped away. The phone immediately shut off, I didn't even know if I had captured a picture of her. She said she would take some pics of herself in the dashiki and send it to me later, I said ok and charged my phone.
When the phone came back on and I was so pleased to see that it had actually taken the picture before it shut of!
As amazing as that is, it pleases me even more when I see the joy that was captured on my client's face. I said to myself with teary blurry eyes...."This is why I do what I do."
Now I realize that when I make my dreams a reality by creating something in this world, I am walking the path of my higher self.
I realize what a gift it is to have a blog that gives me the freedom to express myself. As a blogger. I honor this ability it and uphold this position with great joy and high standards. With great power comes great response abilities..... is a tip I would give to every blogger.
My top 3 tips for beginning bloggers are:
1. Focus on what you love, follow your heart to make your dreams come true
2. Choose topics that serve your audience and that you are passionate about,. This passion will sustain you during challenging times and so will the joy you give to your clients.
3. Start now, perfection is overrated. Action is the language of our physical reality, so express yourself.
So now I speak to you from my heart. It took me over 20 years of my life, taking care of household duties as a mother of 3 children and all the circumstances that I went through to get to this point today and say to you.....Choose Love Now. And in every now there is.
Infinite Love and Peace,
Gefa Banini